Audible Cowfeces

If you happen to be rich, a pedophile audiophile, and a douche then these stereo cables were custom made for you. At $7250 per 12 ft pair, these Pear Cable Anjou speaker cables are machine built and hand terminated from the finest materials such as "Teflon, air, cotton, and fully annealed 99.999% pure oxygen free Copper". These amazing materials when twisted into a new and completely unique hybrid geometry "allows new levels of sonic accuracy to be explored." You hear that? No? Well that's because you haven't actually HEARD until you've paid $7250 to hear through these cables. Pear cables uses science and big words like reactance and capacitance that testify to the accuracy of these cables. There is even a graph that shows you what you haven't yet heard. I have decided to include my own graph to demonstrate the scientific basis behind this post.



The kicker is that this company is headquartered in a house located three blocks from where I used to live. Before you decide to throw a party and invite a few dozen of your closest porpoise friends make sure you buy these.